What right have I to mourn and pout
When others face despair refined?
I insist on yelling, and to the world shout
While many face fear and pain combined.
A dream defaced, who really cares?
Did it really mean a thing?
A vision of happiness beyond repair
Upon a time it was everything.
So many find so much less than I
Can I allow myself to wallow?
To my dearest dream I say goodbye
It’s a bitter pill to swallow.
But gulp I do and down it goes
But soon I feel a fever
A deeper dread in me arose
How I wish I was a believer.
I could fill my life with deeds fulfilling
Be happy in my days
But a part of me remains unwilling
To accept the sunshine’s rays.
Replace the dream, change my goal
Yes, I could be happy
But doubts within take control
That lead to a path unhappy.
Aren’t I just staying busy
Filling time, waiting till the end
Remaining tizzily frantically dizzy
Until there’s no time left to spend?
I wish I could read some magic book
There has to be some meaning.
But no matter where I look
I find myself still screaming.
